Milk Duds

Now that we’ve covered Chilly L’s favorite drug store offering, I feel it’s time to cover mine:

Milk Duds:

Just in case you are in the pitiable position of never having had a Milk Dud, I will describe them (to the extent that the narrow confines of human language are capable of the task). Milk Duds are irregular balls of chocolate covered caramel; however, unlike other chocolate-covered-blank candies, Milk Duds are texturally homogenous somehow. There is no clearly defined point at which the milk chocolate exterior end and the caramel interior takes over. The result is a unique and delicious way of experiencing both ingredients.

Despite my own personal obsession with Duds, potential snackers must be warned that they are very chewy and sticky. Tough chewiness is my favorite candy consistency, but there are many who I’m sure would be put off by a Milk Dud’s tendency to stick in one’s molars and who would shirk at the possible jaw exhaustion involved in eating a whole box. Thus, I cannot recommend Milk Duds to everyone, but rather to those who like a challenge.

To those who do undertake a box of Milk Duds, don’t fear if you get one stuck fast in your teeth. You can chew another Milk Dud to dislodge it. Just be careful when you are down to your last Dud, as you will have no recourse if it decides to entrap you. You may even decide quit while you are ahead if you only have one left.

The Milk Duds package has remained basically unchanged for as long as I can recall. It is simple and easily identifiable, without the clutter of special offers and media tie-ins that many drug store candies sport. I have recently seen Duds packaged in milk-carton like boxes in addition to the usual rectangular box.

Finally I will note that a large percentage of my Dud consumption happens in the theatre. Each box has plenty inside and they are so laborious to eat that there’s a good chance they will last past the first act with a little restraint.

RATING: 5

Chilly Laura’s View:

Milk duds are not a favorite of mine, though I do not despise them.  I am not usually one to go for really sticky, chewy candies.  However, Teabo’s review made me realize that there is another reason I don’t care for them.  It’s that weird amalgamation of chocolate and caramel.  One of my favorite aspects of chocolate is its very unique melty texture.  The flavor is great, of course, but take away the texture and it becomes a bizarre and disconcerting candy experience, at least, for me.  This is also why I have no affection for Tootsie Rolls.  At least Tom gets to keep all his movie candy to himself!

RATING: 2.5

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